True You, Loading

"Just be yourself," they say.

Yet most of us have never had the pleasure

of meeting ourselves.

Not really.

Because unpacking the expectations of others

and leaving them along the roadside

just isn't done.

The litter of family trauma.

The residue of what's been done to us.

The endless not-enoughness—

It all gets stitched in.

Sewn in lies

like threads of steel

among the soft linen weave

of a human life.

Oh, you've imagined yourself.

The one you were supposed to be

if only that thing hadn't happened—

You've felt the powder keg

of ambition

and will

to shift,

be whole,

arrive—

Only to step directly back

into the muddy sinkhole

of what others have said,

done,

or maybe thought.

(Maybe not.)

You just don't have "it."

You need to be thinner,

prettier,

smarter,

more disciplined,

more healed,

more something.

So you hold on.

You stay in character.

You think the same thoughts

that got you through the tough times

even though

these aren't the tough times.

Not like those.

You experience the same feelings:

"I'm suffering."

"I'm surviving."

"This is the best I can do."

And even as you say it,

you know it's an old story.

It no longer applies.

Yet...

you just can't stop.

The You you seek—

the one with competence,

confidence,

and chemistry—

has not yet met you

in the wild.

The You you want to meet

is still out there—

across the next river.

Waiting to be witnessed.

To be chosen.

That's the mission.

Remember yourself.

Honor the past that built you.

Then run like your ass is on fire

toward the You

you have always been.

To think

what you think.

To feel

what you feel.

And to finally—

FINALLY—

stand in your own skin.

True You, Loading.

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